‘Twas the Night Before Christmas: The 2018 Edition

2018 twas the night

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through Cruz Bay,
The streets were hoppin’ again, we love it this way!
It was a tough year, we’re so glad you came back,
A big thanks to all for gettin’ us on track!
Our beaches are gorgeous, the trails are cleared,
Now let’s toast to that with an icy cold beer!
We have so many restaurants that are ready for you,
And lots of great shops, we promise, it’s true!
Now back on the beach, I heard a small clatter,
So I ran from High Tide to see what’s the matter.
Down to the ferry dock, I flew like a flash,
Grabbed a quick glass of wine before hearing a splash.
The moon on the bay and the twinkling lights,
Out past Gallows Bay, I saw something in flight.
When what to my wondering eyes should I see,
but a miniature sleigh and eight tiny donkey.
With a tanned little driver, so lively and quick,
I know in a moment it must be St. Nick!
More rapid than mongoose, his escorts they came,
and he whistled and shouted and called them by name:
“Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on, Cupid! on, Donder and Blixen!
To Coral Bay we must fly! We’re so proud of that place!
Its residents are full of such love & such grace!
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricanes fly,
Our wishes came true, so many clear skies.
So out toward the east, the escorts they flew,
With a sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.
And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof,
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I grabbed my beach towel and was turning around,
Down the palm tree St. Nicholas came with a bound!
He was dressed in flip flops, Painkiller in hand,
And looked so happy to’ve ditched snow for the sand.
With a snorkel in tow and fins on his feet,
He’s ready for the turtles, oh my, what a treat!
His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples, how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His skin was so tan, from his head to his toes,
He just looked so happy to be far from the snow!
He grabbed his sunscreen and downed another cold drink,
Took a dip in the pool and gave me a wink.
He had a broad face and a cute little belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.
We took a quick selfie and he hopped out of the pool,
Who would have thought he would be so darn cool!
The fun had to end, time to get back to work,
So he filled the stockings, then turned with a jerk.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the palm tree he rose;
He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, as he flew toward the Bight—
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”

17 thoughts on “‘Twas the Night Before Christmas: The 2018 Edition”

  1. This is the best ever “parody”of the Night Before! What a hoot…Santa with a painkiller. Thanks for the constant updates, it’s a lot of work and much appreciated. We hope 2019 is a great rebuilding year for everyone on St. John. Happy New Year!

  2. This is the absolute most precious “Night Before Christmas” I’ve EVER read! Who is the author??? I have never even been to St. John!!! But it is on my heart and my bucket list to just come and stay (MAYBE FOREVER!) and enjoy the beautiful vibe that everyone at St. John emits!!! I LOVE ST JOHN!!!

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